Mind over Heart
These are things I believed in but somewhere to some extent I did loose my way. Not anymore.
What is more important to possess a clean mind or a "good" heart?
Clear thoughts or vague feelings? Reason or emotion?
In my opinion The Mind is the most beautiful and the most powerful creation.
To have an unpleasant mind and bitter thoughts and then try and compensate by showing feelings of sympathy and pity is pointless.
Emotions are good as long as they are not allowed to guide and rule out lives.
Emotions and feelings are a temporary state of being. If I were to base my understanding of something on feelings and emotions then, I would be disrespecting the ability of my thoughts, my mind and the power to reason which almost all human beings possess.
I rather follow my mind than my heart.
posted by Rachana at 6:38 pm
8 Comments:
I think that both elements within the system should be allowed equal rights. You're making it too easy on yourself by choosing between "Clear thoughts or vague feelings". I've had many experiences that I acted on my intuition, my feelings, because they were far more clear than my thoughts could have been. I would also not underestimate the influence of the heart on the mind, whether you want it to have it or not.
In my opinion your notions of heart and mind might be a bit too romantic. Assuming that by "heart" you mean emotion and associated traits like intuition, the feel-aspect of mankind, the heart is a lot older than the mind is. So it has bragging rights in terms of evolutionary purposes. It's still here, so it ought to be fairly strong and relevant. In fact, "heart" has developed throughout the years, making room to some extent for the accentuation of the mind but its main purpose, that of empathy, is a key principle for our survival.
An unpleasant or bitter mind may very well be the product of a broken heart. Tell me, what is the sense in having bitter thoughts and "try and compensate by showing feelings of sympathy and pity"? What is your reasoning here? That mind and heart are two separate and unrelated things? I don't think I agree with that, I find that both are mighty constructs within the human system and that both are connected because both are concerned with our basic need and desire, that of survival and enhancement.
Emotions can be very powerful things and some of them may display long term impacts your mind cannot even begin to fathom beforehand. A love, a friendship, these are founded on emotion. Are you going to tell me that none of those matter? That none of them are worthy of basing an existence on? As I point out, I see merit in involving the mind with heart business and vice versa, but I am not an advocate of basing an entire life solely on thought, nor do I advocate the opposite. That is a choice best made by the individual...if it is even a choice to make.
A feeling is knowledge translated into a language poorly remembered by your brains. It is not irrelevant or less important than verbalized knowledge, it is also no less influential. It is primary and although you may dislike how chaotic all of it may appear and how basic it is, it's there for a good reason...so you best embrace it.
If you would base your life on thought and reasoning, you are showing great disrespect to that what makes you the fine human being that you are. Yes, leave the thinking aspect of life to reasoning, but leave that which cannot be dealt with through the mind to the heart. That which is illogical or appears to make no sense may not be as ridiculous as it might appear to you. In the end it boils down to the faith you have in yourself, your entire being...not just a part of it.
I think I'll just keep an ear and eye open for both elements, and decide accordingly. If the choice is even mine to make.
I never said in my post that the mind and heart are two different entities. I also did not completely undermine the importance of feelings and emotions. But, from my experiences I do realise that basing my judgments on some temporary random emotion does not work for me.
Passion is good. It is a force that drives me to do better work, but I would not want to let it guide my decision making.
How do you come to the conclusion that the heart is older than the mind?
The sense in having bitter thoughts and then compensating by feelings of pity and sympathy is a way an individual tells himself that he is not a bad person because he is good at heart. "He thinks or does ill, but means well".
For me love and friendship is not something I can solely base on emotion. The compatibility of the mind and thought does play the most important role here.
I do believe that if your mind is clear and clean, then you are more capable of understanding your emotions and feelings and as a result display genuine compassion and empathy.
I'm mostly responding from paragraph to paragraph here due to some computer difficulties.
Yes, but I'm saying that the heart and mind are two different entities, or at the least two different but closely related phenomena. Indeed, you did not completely undermine the relevance of emotion, but you would have, if you could have. As I pointed out, the choices you made were put way too easy by yourself, for whatever reason you had in mind. "clear thought versus vague emotion", that's a no-brainer indeed. But emotion is not always vague, just as thought is not always clear.
Check out this link, it's a theory, but sounds plausible to me: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reptilian_brain
Emotion and thought are two things that occur in the brain, the brain more often related in popular culture to mind, and heart to feeling. Fact is that your heart, the organ that pumps blood through your body, feels fairly little.
One cannot have bitter thoughts and mean well, meaning well is anathema to having bitter thoughts. That is what I mean by emotion and thought being two separate but closely related phenomena.
It's the connection that emotion and thought share that matters-enhancement and survival-not the differences they have. Both are equally important, making yourself blind for that could be very harmful in the long run.
Of course not, love and friendship are principles based on biology, physical reactions, chemical reactions within your body. Finding, or rather, looking for intellectual mutuality is done after the act of bonding and may indeed then ruin a relationship. Sometimes it doesn't.
And the other way around, if emotions are clear, strong and pure they will guide your thoughts in a positive manner, allowing the thoughts to be positive of nature.
I am not making it easy for myself, but rather trying to understand what works for me. In my opinion, emotions are vague and it is the clarity of thoughts that we need to achieve.
Again, I am not saying that emotions are not important or that we should become stone hearted and insensitive human beings.
Emotions guided by thoughts just seems more sensible.
I do not agree that the act of bonding or emotions comes before intellectual compatibility in love or friendship. In fact, it is this lack of compatibility and understanding that ruins a relationship and not the search for it.
I disagree again that emotions guide or should be allowed to guide our thoughts. That, I think would be dangerous and harmful in the long run. If the mind is positive and thoughts clear then one can be in control and understand their emotions and respond accordingly.
I experience difficulty understanding you. Could you explain to me what is hard about choosing between clear thought and vague emotion? It seems to me that you might be forcing yourself towards a choice you feel you have to make.
I'm not sure about one dominating or guiding the other. Feelings are equally valid information as thoughts in my opinion, rendering it senseless to guide one by using the other. I find that one of the basic requirements to reach full emotional maturity is not the control of emotions, but the embrace thereof. Coming to terms with all that is you and acting accordingly.
The act of bonding must come before reaching intellectual grounds, because it is this bonding that renders common intellectual grounds as important. I think I understand what you mean though, you're saying that you need an intellectual peer to be attracted to in relationships. With this you are disregarding the very basics of biology, the chemistry within the brain which manifests itself as chemistry between two people. If you're trying to say that you won't go near a person without first determining their intellectual grounds, then 1.You're missing out on a lot. And 2.You will spend your entire life virtually alone, since in order to determine intellectual grounds, one must interact with the individual and when that happens, the basic rules of biology have already kicked in.
If somebody does something to me that I find disrespectful, harming or just indecent this may anger me...and when somebody angers me, I do not think very nice thoughts about that person. It is anger, the emotion, which then provokes the thought. So it does happen, and it is not necessarily a bad thing in my opinion. As I pointed out earlier, emotion and thought are the two sides of the evolutionary enhancement of mankind coin. Emotion is downright pointless without thought, and thought is downright destructive without emotion. Letting one guide the other will prove to be pointless methinks, letting both interact with each other, would be a glorious achievement of mankind in my opinion.
I read your recent update and will deviate a little from your last response to this post.
To begin with, in spite of all the differences we have as humans what do you think is that one and the ultimate goal that unites all of us?
In my opinion, it is our search for happiness. Whether we opt for a certain career, or a partner, or buy a car, make lots of money or choose certain values. No matter how far fetched it might seem, we all want happiness.
Happiness is an emotion. It is attainment of this emotion which drives us. Out here, I would say that emotion comes first and then the thoughts and decisions to achieve it follow. I don't think anybody out of choice would want to be sad or depressed.
What is it that does not make us happy?
Situations which create unpleasant emotions like jealousy, fear, anger to some extent insecurity etc. Even some unfortunate incidents like death, accidents or even negative thinking. Anything that takes us further away from happiness can be termed as "destructive". I am not saying that these emotions are "bad" or "wrong" or that we should not feel them. We are humans, we feel, and without emotions we are as good as dead or like robots with pumping hearts.
At the same them we cannot let them guide us.
We need to understand and even control them to be happy.
We need thought, reasoning and clarity of the mind.
We use reason not to wipe out these emotions, but to understand them.
Now, in response to your reply to this post.
I will not know whether I am compatible with a person without going near them. I don't know about the take of biology, chemistry or physics in this matter. Let me put it this way, I don't believe in love at first sight, but I do believe in love at first conversation! :)
I am very much aware of the consequences of my thinking in terms of being virtually alone which seemed possible at one time. But, I know that my belief in the clarity of thoughts and my mind will not only make me more tolerant and understanding towards my feelings and emotions but also that of others.
As for loosing out on things. Yes, I might loose out on few things, maybe to gain much more.
So, life is basically self-gratification? Yes, I believe that as well. Happiness is too big a word in some situations, but yes, it is always the selfish need that dictates human behaviour.
Emotion of happiness comes third in my opinion. First there is the need (that's 1) then there are the actions to achieve that need (that's 2) and then when one succeeds happiness kicks in (that's 3). What's so miserable about it, is that one can fall from 3 to 1 in an instant, the blink of an eye, the flash of a second.
If emotions are not bad or wrong, then they are not destructive. It is the action one takes in the name of these emotions that may end up destructive but those actions stem from the limitations humanity must cope with, not the emotions themselves. In the light of my previous update, I'm not choosing for them to guide me, I am choosing to accept them as facts, and investigate their nature. To an extent I then become subject to feelings more than most rational people would find appropriate but it is, in my opinion, the only method of adequately dealing with the cues the emotions give out to me. Also, in the light of my previous update, I most definitely was using reason to simply wipe them out, or rather, to try wiping them out. It is this shift of a mindset, from simple ignoring to investigating and accepting, that I tried to outline in said update.
Recent studies in neuroscience have indicated that a consistent number of chemicals are present in the brain when people testify to feeling love. These chemicals include; Testosterone, Oestrogen, Dopamine, Norepinephrine, Serotonin, Oxytocin, and Vasopressin. More specifically, higher levels of Testosterone and Oestrogen are present during the lustful phase of a relationship. Dopamine, Norepinephrine, and Serotonin are more commonly found during the attraction phase of a relationship. Oxytocin, and Vasopressin seemed to be more closely linked to long term bonding and relationships characterized by strong attachments.-Wikipedia
Some of these chemicals are also closely linked to obsessive compulsive behaviour, which would explain why people in love can hardly think of anything else but the other person. Though I am unsure when and how these chemicals are activated, it does seem sensible to believe that love at first sight, or rather smell, does exist.
Whatever it is you believe, I have no real say in the matter. I believe that I could fall in love on first sight, but I would definitely need an intellectual equal to remain attracted to the individual. In fact, as the person I am, relationships that close in nature will fail if the other person does not share interests and understanding. It's one of the few reasons I do not pursue such relationships, it would take up too much time, time I feel I should be spending on my work.
Yes, I agree work comes first.
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